i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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