Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
