i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
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