escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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