How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
