I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!