Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
