I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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