I must be too annoying 4 u.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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