Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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