It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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