i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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