I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
nutella sex= disaster
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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