The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
