Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i will never coherently bang her
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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