dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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