Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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