I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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