I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Congratulations! We have a period
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