Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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