Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
