About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
