Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just pee around me
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
