do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
40s are totally the cure
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
