Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
ttyl tear gas
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
