If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
