Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
