Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
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It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
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I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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