Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
id be glad to
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
