My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
