Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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