You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
