Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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