He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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