these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
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