Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
