this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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