i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
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Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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