There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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