There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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