I will die if light touches me.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
