I wannas sexs uuuuu
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Randomize
