woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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