Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
