I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
