hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
