I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Randomize
