I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
