the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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