Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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