You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just gift wrapped bread.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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